Wednesday, May 16, 2007

Do you remember when you were 15?

  • Days until Birthday: 12
  • Currently hearing: the sound of silence.. literally.
  • Currently watching: My So Called Life
  • Biggest annoyance: Having 'Buttons' by The Pussycat Dolls stuck on my mind - I mean wtf?!

Browsing through recently I bumped into a personal must-have. When I was 15 years old I used to watch 'My So Called Life' every Monday and I was so in love with that series. It hit a nerve with me being 15 years old and entering that stage where you personally perceive yourself as a grown up, but your surroundings -and your parents least of all - don't see you as such. The series is about Angela and the struggles she meets in life as a 15-year-old girl in high school. Her first love, her struggle with finding her voice in the bigger issues, her problems with adjusting and settling into a role she feels is forced upon her and the general ups and downs of being a teenager in the 90s. I myself was a teenager in the 90s so needless to say I felt like the series had been handmade for me.

When I saw the complete series for sale on I immediately ordered it and just the other day it was delivered to our mailbox. In many ways it's almost like timetravel watching the series again after all these years. I had quite a lot of the episodes on video and they've been watched through and through hundreds of times, but I can't even recall the last time I watched them. It is pure nostalgia for me watching episode after episode and recalling all the messed up emotions and awkwardness I myself struggled with at that age. I see so much of it in Angela (Claire Danes). Right down to the fact that she passionately hungers for Jordan (Jared Leto), who is so obviously no good for her, while she plainly ignores Brian (Devon Gummersall), the extremely intelligent and nerdy boy from next door. Watching it now, at the age of almost 27, I sit and yell "LOOK AT BRIAN!!" at the screen, while back in 1994-1995 I found him deeply annoying. Haha. One really changes perspective, huh? At the age of 15 I wanted someone looking like Leto. At the age of 25 I wanted someone with smarts and heart. At the age of almost 27 I am engaged to someone who looks better than Leto ever could, has smarts and a heart the size of my head. Fairytale ending? Yeah, I think so too.

Do you remember when you were 15? I do now after the first 7 out of 19 episodes of My So Called Life. I was the girl, who dreamt of performing and who did extra curricular music and singing. I was the girl, who loved and trusted her parents, but spent most of her time hiding from them, so they wouldn't feel disappointed when she didn't live up to their expectations. I was the girl, who tried her best to fit in, but was always in an inner conflict, because the morals of the people she surrounded herself with didn't match her own. I was the girl, whose father became ill with cancer which forced her to be strong. I was the girl, who hung out with the tough crowd, but got really nice grades in school. I was the girl, who wrote poetry and songlyrics in stead of being an impossible teenager and taking it out on her parents. I was the girl, who never caused any grief, worry or trouble for anyone - but herself. I was the girl, who dreamt so big and never realised that at some point those dreams would cause a fall. I was the girl, who would one day become a woman with such pride and joy in life as could never have been imagined.

12 years later and thinking about all of this can still bring tears to my eyes. Sometimes I miss that girl so much, but I am proud of who and what she turned into. She did well for herself and all her dreams will forever be cherished.


Just because you can't spell 'drama' without a D...

  • Days until Birthday: 13
  • Number of worn out nerves: about a million-zillion
  • Kilos lost: 2 (yay!)
  • Currently hearing: Linkin Park "Minutes to Midnight".

Ah! Here I am again. Today featuring a little dragonfly I made from glass beads. I actually made several of the little dudes so far - out of pure boredom. But hey, job applications are out not much more I can do until I hear something from someone.

You're wondering about the title aren't you? I figured as much. I promised a drama-free blog and I'll stick to my promises, but I will let you in on some thoughts I'm left with after a little bump in the drama-highway aka the Internet:
Are cultural differences so significant that they don't only cause misunderstandings and awkwardness, but also cause total and utter lack of common tact? Can culture/nationality actually be the basis of an entire lack of tact and sympathy for fellow human beings?
A few years back I came to an understanding that was probably a little out there, but never the less it struck me that as a starting point all people are somehow evil. 'Has she lost it?', you're wondering, but no. Think about it. We harm others, judge them, back stab, lie, cheat, condescend, ridicule, hurt, belittle etc. - all the time. Sometimes we don't think of it at all, we just do it naturally, almost like an instinct. But is that cultural? Can someone actually hide behind 'in my country....'? To me there are different levels of 'evil'. With some it's really very innocent and seems to come from a otherwise respecting and caring human being. But then there are people who just totally lack all respect for others. They walk all over other people's alabaster-white feelings with muddy wellington boots while acting high and mighty, hiding behind 'cultural differences'.
Taking it a little further not only cultural heritage is a well working invisibility cloak, one can also at all times open a can of 'democracy, freedom of speech and dictatorship'. And if that doesn't work there's the good old fashioned insult, you know one step above 'yo momma is so fat...'-jokes. The insult that punches the air out of your opponent while you smirk along thinking you'll stand victorious.
It's all so textbook. Yet it surprises me every time how low people will sink to either belittle others or just to redeem themselves. Do I need to make you look bad to make me look good? No, I don't, because making you look bad makes me look worse. Kind of simple logic really. But never the less people are interesting and so are their conflicts. Often the bullies are in reality the bullied, which is an intense fact in itself.
I could go on and on about this, but I think my point is made. You can't spell 'drama' without D, but this D is one step ahead of it.
Rock on rockers! D.

Sunday, May 13, 2007

Eurovision is dyyyyyyiiiiing...

  • Days until Birthday: 15
  • Currently hearing: "Leave Me Alone" by Hanna Pakarinen
  • Minutes on exercise bike: 20

The finals of the Eurovision Song Contest are over and man was that an anticlimax if I ever felt one. All due respect to Serbia, who delivered the winning song, it was very nice, but not at all a winner in my ears. I think possibly I have just not tuned myself in for this contest for years now. I stopped watching back when Denmark started becoming an embarrassment, so that would pretty much be.... eerrrrr... back in the beginning of the 90s or something. It just turned into a yearly torment reminding me how absolutely out of rhythm we were compared to the rest of Europe. I now sit here, maybe 10-15 years later and think "What the deuce?!", because now it's not just the Danish music scene that is out of rhythm, I am too. Can I really be this picky about music? I mean, I sort of feel that I normally like most stuff on the hit lists, but today I sat for 3 long hours and felt like I was musically-challenged. None of the stuff except one song, the entry from Finland, appealed to me. I saw song after song getting the 'deuce points' and wondered "What am I not hearing here?" I guess, to be honest, Eurovision just isn't my cup of tea. Maybe I should just let it not be that rather than trying my darnest to be supportive and sympathetic with my neighbour countries and not forcefully try to build up that dreaded national pride when a drag queen much resembling a pink peacock rapist, takes the stage and does a number I swear I heard before. Maybe Eurovision just isn't for everybody, or maybe just not for me. I love the fact that it appeals to the vast majority of the European countries and that it opens a forum for exchanging of musical inspiration and cultural learning and I will continue to see it as that. But to me? The spirit of Eurovision is dying in political, biased connections countries in between. It is not a contest anymore, it's a cockfight. And the music suffers.

On a more cheerful note it's after midnight which means it's mother's day in Denmark. Happy mother's day to my mum, the loveliest most fantastic woman in the world. Much love to you.

Rock on rockers and enjoy the Finnish entry in Eurovision, the gorgeous Hanna.

Thursday, May 10, 2007

Let me entertain you....

  • Days until Birthday: 17
  • Currently hearing: "Daughtry" by Daughtry
  • Most annoying current habbit: Quotes - here, there and EVERYWHERE!

Now this put a big ol' smile on my face. Stewie tapping with Mr Gene Kelly. I love it and figured I should share it with you all to put big ol' smiles on all your faces as well. Admit it, your feet are tapping along. Haha, I knew it.

I've been trying to come up with new and exciting ideas for my blog and so far I have added some links and stuff. For the playful souls among us, go to the bottom of the blog and join Prizee via the add I have on here. Play a few games each day, earn points (aka bubz) and win prices. Simple -yet good fun.

Today we watched the semifinals of the Eurovision Song contest. It was an awfully embarrassing experience watching it as a Dane. I can't BELIEVE we sent that dude to the finals. The number sucked so much ass! Needless to say we didn't make it onto the finals, but that's perfectly okay. I have all my money on Finland. Well... I actually don't have any money on them, but if I was the gambling kind it would be on Finland. Their song is the kind of song that I would actually listen to normally. And if The Ark wins for Sweden it would be perfectly cool as well. They gave us 'It takes a Fool to remain sane', ie. they are small gods.

Looks like I'll be in Århus for my Birthday. Johan finishes exams around the 25th of May and so we'll go over and be with my mum and dad for my birthday. That'll be really nice. I just wish my sister could be there too, you know.. having my family there. But it's okay, we'll probably get to see each other later this year, maybe around Christmas. Mad isn't it? We used to see each other like every day, now we might only see each other a few times a year if we're lucky. Madness!

Well, I'm off for now. Enjoy Gene Kelly and Stewie, it can actually be watched more than once... like 30 times and then you'll feel like you're going loony. Without doing drugs! Thanks Mr Kelly.
Rock on people.

Monday, May 7, 2007

It's a new dawn, it's a new day...

  • Currently reading: Donald Spoto's "Marilyn Monroe - The Biography".

  • Currently hearing: Fall Out Boy's "Infinity on High"
  • Days until Birthday: 21
It's a new dawn, it's a new day and time for some changes. A layout change for the blog, provided by my fiancé Aulin, and an attitude change for the author. I've been sulking about not getting the job I was at an interview for and really that's silly. In all fairness you don't always get what you want, right? And there'll be plenty other jobs and opportunities, I know that much.
Life truly goes on and never have I been as much reminded of that as recently. Is there anything more pathetic than people who keep stirring up trouble about the past? People who will go to any length to try and avenge their hurt feelings or maybe just the fact that they didn't get things their way. And funnily enough even when approaching the rather ridiculous matter with mature intentions, the counterpart doesn't seem to get the idea. In stead the little exchange of opinions is taken as some sort of blame shift. And in stead of leaving the matter at peace another bout of insults is spread into cyberspace. Here's my advice on the matter: Let sleeping dogs lie. Grow up, you might actually like it.

Well, I'm the kind of person who keeps her promises. And I promise that this blog is a drama-free zone. So now that I have spoken my mind it's over and done with. There will be no mention of it ever again as it's in my past and my past fits nicely where it is. Let's look towards the future in stead, it's far more exciting!

My friend Nadine provided me with the advice of the day: "Chin up girl or you'll get wrinkles on your neck". Stay wrinkle free rockers and keep your chins up!