Diagnosis Known

I'm torn between worry and relief. Mostly I'm relieved though. I've had a feeling for a while that I might have PCOS ( http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pcos ) and today it was confirmed. I have PCOS and will need help to get pregnant. But before I'll get the help I need to lose weight. To lose weight - I'll need help. "I think you should consider a gastric by-pass. You're a perfect candidate", the gynocologist said. But I'm not up for that - am too scared and I really, truly believe that with the right drive I can do this myself. I lost 10 kilos before christmas, but gained a lot again (typical, right?) and the first goal the gyno made was 15 kilos. I can lose that without a gastric by-pass, right? After the 15 kilo weightloss I'll begin hormonal treatment and they'll probably put me on Metformin ( http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Metformin ). Metformin also helps the weightloss, so I'm optimistic that I can do this without surgery. The Metformin also stimulates the eggs and I'll hopefully start ovulating and thereby become pregnant. Whatever happened to dinner and dancing, eh? I'm relieved that I now have a reason why I'm having such a hard time losing weight. I'm active, I eat healthy and I shouldn't have a belly like Santa. But I do and now I know why. Definitely a huge relief - even if the weight thing worries me at the same time. I can do this! 15 kilos to go ... gooooo me!

All I want ...

...is one of these. I'm pretty sure they are a little bit of heaven and I must own one. Please? I swear I'll be nice for the rest of the year. And maybe also a little bit of next year. Maybe. Possibly. Not. But I do want my own moomin snowglobe. Can I have it? Yes? 

Sometimes the good guys finish..?

This is my goldfish. His name is Miyagi and as you can see, he's a handsome lil' fella. I guess you can discuss how much personality a goldfish has, but Miyagi is a rockstar. I don't think anyone can resist his chubby baby cheeks. 

On another note, I'm off to Århus this weekend. We're attending my granny's urne burial. I'm not sure how I feel about it to be honest. It's only been three weeks on Friday since she passed away. I'm very emotional, anxious and generally worried about my mum. I guess it'll be better in time, but at the moment it feels really hard being so far away from home. It would all be a hell of a lot easier if I could just drive over and be with them when I feel like it. But I guess this is just what growing up is all about... standing on your own two feet. These days I just don't want to. Nothing seems to be working for me, all I do well is fail. No weightloss, no motivation, no baby, no point. I guess the good guys really do finish last. 

I don't want to grow up

Some days it's better than others, but often I feel like I'd prefer if I didn't have to grow up and  if I never had to be faced with sadness. Because it's just so damn hard to snap out of it again. It jumps on you when you least expect it. Whether it's during the day while you're busy with other things or it's when you're at home in the evening, sadness will creep up on you and make you feel like your heart might explode. 

Boom.

And the winner is...

The one about being a terrible blogger...

These cupcakes are a bribe. That's right, I'm going to try to bribe you. Maybe if I distract you with cupcakes, you'll forgive me for not writing for like a hundred years. Maybe you'll also forgive me for starting a series of blogs - and then not making it past the first part. Cupcakes don't do it for you? Then how about...

... a puppy! Who would not be distracted by a tiny, ickle pup looking at you with love in it's eyes? I bet you've totally forgotten about what I've done by now... You can only think of the cute little puppy. Puppies aren't your thing? Well, how about...



... doing like this little hedgehog? I'd betcha he isn't thinking about my little faux pas in the world of blogging. 

I'll better myself or die trying. 

Things I Love (part one)

Looking around our flat I spot so many things I absolutely love. Things that I feel say a lot about me. Today we went to Höganäs with Jeanette, who came to visit us this weekend. I found this Moomin biscuit tin and naturally I just had to have it. So I decided it should be the first featured thing in my series of 'Things I Love' blogs. I'll warn you already, I have a lot of stuff so it might become quite a long series. But in all fairness all things come with a story, so I hope you won't be too bored.



In a week my parents and Basse will be here. My parents are going to visit K and Aled in Wales for a week and we'll be minding Basse while they're away. I can't wait! A whole week off with Basse around... that's life. Today he'll be the finishing act in my 'Things I Love' blog. Don't you just want to kiss him?