So what? I'm still a rockstar!

Say 'hello' to mini-D. Isn't it hilarious that that's me? Well it is me anno 1980, sporting a rather flattering yet slightly big hat. Johan and me visited my parents last weekend and I came home with a small collection of photos that I want to scan and have printed. Among these my parents gave me a collection of portraits that were taken of me by a Danish press photographer back when I was a baby. Le photo above is one of these. I love it.

I'm now D minus 8.5 kilos. That's a lot! Yet I still don't really feel like it's so much. Guess that's mostly because I know there's a long way to go still. Granted these first almost 10 kilos help a lot and it's actually a huge chunk of the kilos I want to lose, but still it's just under a third of what I should drop. Grumble. At least I'm on my way, right? And I'm not really suffering to be honest. It's all very much about routines and thinking about what you put in your mouth. I haven't had a piece of chocolate for two months now which is pretty spectacular. It's fantabolous to say the least. It's the shitniz. Yay me.

I'm planning to pack up my fiance and go to Wales for New Year's Eve. My mum and dad are coming here to Helsingborg for Christmas so I'm getting a bit of the Christmas I'm used to, but my sister is getting none of it. And I know that makes her sad. So I'll do all I can to come see her between Christmas and New Year's. That way we won't completely miss out on each other. Sisterly love is a wonderful thing.

Rock on good people.

Please forgive me

I've once again slipped into a stupid habbit of not writing often enough. In all fairness I'm quite busy and the first couple of weeks back in school leave their toll. I'm exhausted when I get back home and just feel like watching TV, being with Johan and not having to use my brain at all. But today was an early day for me, so I feel I have some leftover energy to write a bit.

I'm first of all looking amazingly much forward to the release of the new Fall Out Boy album 'Folie a Deux' on November 4th. Yes, that would also be election day in America, but who gives a hoot when you can spend time listening to the most awesome voice of all: Patrick Stump. I'm like a child before Christmas - I want November to be nooooow!

I'm now 7 kilos lighter, which I'm totally proud of. We've been dieting for 6 weeks, so it's a healthy but steady weightloss. At times it sucks being on a diet, but by now it has become routine. The other day at work two people were celebrating their birthdays and they brought cake and chocolate. Suddenly a colleague says 'Wow, you have such selfdiscipline' and suddenly it dawns on me that I've been chewing along on my carrots and cucumbers and haven't even thought about cake and chocolate. I think the fact that it can be in my presence, and me not even thinking about it, is so awesome. I'm on the right track here.

I started another blog, which I'm not going to link you to because I'm pretty sure that not many people would want to read it. It's basically about the whole baby thing we're going through and it's in Danish. I decided to create another blog for all of that because I'm well aware that I make people sick with all my baby talk. So to spare you guys I've taken it elsewhere. If anyone's interested in reading it you know where to find me for the link.

D minus 5

I did it! I had a personal goal for August. I wanted to lose 5 kilos and today when I weighed myself I was exactly 5 kilos lighter than when we started just over 4 weeks ago. I still have over a week left of August, so I'm excited to see if I'll lose even more. The diet still has it's rough days, but I think it's finally beginning to feel like a routine. I've gone more than a month without chocolate! Can you believe it? I hardly can since that's always been my number one vice. I'm not only a chocoholic, I'm a chocojunkie. But now that I've lasted this long without it, I don't really need it anymore. And no, that's not me trying to be all 'oh I wouldn't ever eat it again and I'm so good', because I'm not going to live a chocolate free life. I'm just not going to eat it often. And I think that's the whole key for me and a healthier lifestyle. I can't eat sugary things too often, but I won't totally deprive myself of them either, because wouldn't it become a very boring life if you couldn't ever treat yourself to something?

Yesterday I spent the day with a bunch of my colleagues. I had a wonderful time with them and I'm so happy that we're all getting along so well. I often feel sad because I left a huge part of my life back in Århus and my social life isn't what it was, but these wonderful women are helping me fill a void in my life.

Today I feel like it's kind of awesome to be me. But hey, you can't spell awesome without 'me' can you?

Oh what the fudge!?

This photo really makes me laugh! Basse looks Chinese, doesn't he? It's an old photo I just found on my computer. It was taken back in my old flat back in Århus, way before I moved to Sweden. It still makes me chuckle when I see it. Oh dear how I miss that dog.

Work's going smoothly so far. It's always rough starting up after a long break, but so far I'm quite optimistic. I was very nervous about starting up a first grade since I'd never tried that before, but it seems to go really well. There are challenges, definitely - some more tiring than others - but I'm still crazy about my job. I feel like I'm making a difference. Plus my dad says I'm a star and even though some people might think 'so what?', it can't even be explained how much it means to me to hear my dad say those words. My parents, my sister and my boyfriend truly believe in me and all that I do - so why can't I?

We've been dieting for the last month. We had planned to start our baby project about now, but we decided to postpone it a couple of months and shed some kilos. This morning, after 4 weeks of dieting, I had lost 4 kilos. 'What the fudge', I thought - this diet is actually working! See, I've become a firm believer of me never being able to lose the damn extra kilos I'm dragging around, but it seems that we might actually be on to something. I'm not starving myself, nor am I torturing myself with soups, shakes and nasties. I'm actually living quite well and still dropping the kilos. Miracles do happen - what the fudge?!

A Candle for Marilyn

I wanted to post this picture last night, but I just never got around to it. Yesterday it was 46 years since Marilyn Monroe passed away. I've made a little tradition out of lighting a candle for her on the night of August 5th.

And it seems to me you lived your life

Like a candle in the wind

Never knowing who to cling to

When the rain set in

And I would have liked to have known you

But I was just a kid

Your candle burned out long before

Your legend ever did

I know I suck, so don't remind me

It's been very long since my last post, I know. I'm also well aware that I suck not having updated, but not much I can do about that now. I guess I just needed a time out or something - a summerbreak from blogging. I'm going to try and slowly get back into writing as it's almost time to go back to work and I can pick up all my old habbits again.

I've had a few good months lately.

I had my birthday, which was awesome. My parents and my aunt and uncle came over a few days before my birthday to celebrate. I got so many awesome gifts this year. Thanks to everyone for the presents. It's very clear to me that the people who give me gifts truly know who I am and what I like. I love that.

Lady Lei visited me and Johan for a weekend, which was also awesome. We had a couple of really great days together where we among other things went to Bakken to meet up with Edel. It was lovely having Lei here.

Marianne and Morten also came for a day to see how we live and just to hang out. Was great fun having them here as well. I love having visitors and being 'the hostess'. It's fun cooking for guests and doing something special.

We went to Denmark for our summerholidays this year. We spent a week in Vejlby Klit with my family, ie mum, dad, K and Al. We stayed in a gorgeous house with a pool, spa and all the goods. The weather was great and we had a really nice week there. We stayed at my parents' house for about a week as well, and it was lovely just to be with them. I guess moving away has made me more of a mum's and dad's girl than I ever was. I don't know, I just tend to miss them a lot. And of course there's Basse, who I can say with 100% certainty everyone would miss if they met him. It's always so empty coming home from a week or two in the company of Basse.

Things will speed up again in a week's time. I start work on Friday, the kids start on Monday. I'm looking forward to it in a way, which might have a lot to do with the fact that I have taken it very easy for the last couple of weeks. I need to be 100% ready for a new schoolyear with lots of new experiences and challenges.

On a more personal level I also start therapy from next week. My dad has been so kind to help me out financially, so I can get my anxiety/panicattacks sorted out. It all escalated just before the holidays started, and I was having multiple attacks most days of the week. I sense that this time out from work and most other things has helped so far. But I need to be able to handle these things in my worklife as well, so I'm getting help. I'm nervous, but looking forward to it.

Updates are hard! I can't really seem to think of all the many things I should be writing here. If I suddenly recall something I've left out, I'll fill you in.

They can break your cookie, but... you'll always have your fortune

• Currently feeling: sick
• Newest craze: Katy Perry - thanks to Patricia for introducing me to her music
• Currently in love with: the new blog design Johan's been working on for me

I've been ridiculous at writing lately. I know. I'm not even going to try and deny it. There's just been so much going on at work and as things are right now, work comes first. Sad but true. I guess it's just one of those things that comes with being a teacher. Somehow we tend to think we're a little bit saint - a little bit saviour. Only thing is, we're not really. We just seem to be unable to leave work behind when we head home. Or at least I think that's what it's all about. Experienced teachers seem to have this on/off button they can just switch on or off whenever they feel like it. Personally I just can't. I'm thinking it's because I'm a new teacher and I still let the little ones get in under my skin. I've always considered myself a rather empathetic person, but maybe there are situations where you need to be able to shut that off. If buying a bag of 'out of sight, out of mind' was possible, I'd be first in line fighting with teeth and nails.

So what has today been all about? It's been about a snotty nose and pure misery. Okay, not completely, but seriously... who enjoys having a cold? I feel sorry for myself even though I'm pretty sure it's self inflicted what with me riding my bike to work every day with no socks and semi short trousers. Have I learnt my lesson? Probably not. Note to self: Stock up on Kleenex every late April/ early May.

In 26 (almost only 25) days I'll be 28. Christ on a bike time really flies by. I've no big plans for the day at all. I've work on the day of my birthday and also the following day, so there's no real reason I should make any plans. Plus it's 28 - not much to celebrate. Send me a card if you'd like. That always puts a smile on my face. With all my past birthdays and all the cards I usually get I guess it's no wonder I'm turning wrinkly.

Check out Katy Perry I bet she'll be the talk of the town this summer, so do yourself a favour and check her out so you're prepared.