D minus 5

I did it! I had a personal goal for August. I wanted to lose 5 kilos and today when I weighed myself I was exactly 5 kilos lighter than when we started just over 4 weeks ago. I still have over a week left of August, so I'm excited to see if I'll lose even more. The diet still has it's rough days, but I think it's finally beginning to feel like a routine. I've gone more than a month without chocolate! Can you believe it? I hardly can since that's always been my number one vice. I'm not only a chocoholic, I'm a chocojunkie. But now that I've lasted this long without it, I don't really need it anymore. And no, that's not me trying to be all 'oh I wouldn't ever eat it again and I'm so good', because I'm not going to live a chocolate free life. I'm just not going to eat it often. And I think that's the whole key for me and a healthier lifestyle. I can't eat sugary things too often, but I won't totally deprive myself of them either, because wouldn't it become a very boring life if you couldn't ever treat yourself to something?

Yesterday I spent the day with a bunch of my colleagues. I had a wonderful time with them and I'm so happy that we're all getting along so well. I often feel sad because I left a huge part of my life back in Århus and my social life isn't what it was, but these wonderful women are helping me fill a void in my life.

Today I feel like it's kind of awesome to be me. But hey, you can't spell awesome without 'me' can you?

Oh what the fudge!?

This photo really makes me laugh! Basse looks Chinese, doesn't he? It's an old photo I just found on my computer. It was taken back in my old flat back in Århus, way before I moved to Sweden. It still makes me chuckle when I see it. Oh dear how I miss that dog.

Work's going smoothly so far. It's always rough starting up after a long break, but so far I'm quite optimistic. I was very nervous about starting up a first grade since I'd never tried that before, but it seems to go really well. There are challenges, definitely - some more tiring than others - but I'm still crazy about my job. I feel like I'm making a difference. Plus my dad says I'm a star and even though some people might think 'so what?', it can't even be explained how much it means to me to hear my dad say those words. My parents, my sister and my boyfriend truly believe in me and all that I do - so why can't I?

We've been dieting for the last month. We had planned to start our baby project about now, but we decided to postpone it a couple of months and shed some kilos. This morning, after 4 weeks of dieting, I had lost 4 kilos. 'What the fudge', I thought - this diet is actually working! See, I've become a firm believer of me never being able to lose the damn extra kilos I'm dragging around, but it seems that we might actually be on to something. I'm not starving myself, nor am I torturing myself with soups, shakes and nasties. I'm actually living quite well and still dropping the kilos. Miracles do happen - what the fudge?!

A Candle for Marilyn

I wanted to post this picture last night, but I just never got around to it. Yesterday it was 46 years since Marilyn Monroe passed away. I've made a little tradition out of lighting a candle for her on the night of August 5th.

And it seems to me you lived your life

Like a candle in the wind

Never knowing who to cling to

When the rain set in

And I would have liked to have known you

But I was just a kid

Your candle burned out long before

Your legend ever did

I know I suck, so don't remind me

It's been very long since my last post, I know. I'm also well aware that I suck not having updated, but not much I can do about that now. I guess I just needed a time out or something - a summerbreak from blogging. I'm going to try and slowly get back into writing as it's almost time to go back to work and I can pick up all my old habbits again.

I've had a few good months lately.

I had my birthday, which was awesome. My parents and my aunt and uncle came over a few days before my birthday to celebrate. I got so many awesome gifts this year. Thanks to everyone for the presents. It's very clear to me that the people who give me gifts truly know who I am and what I like. I love that.

Lady Lei visited me and Johan for a weekend, which was also awesome. We had a couple of really great days together where we among other things went to Bakken to meet up with Edel. It was lovely having Lei here.

Marianne and Morten also came for a day to see how we live and just to hang out. Was great fun having them here as well. I love having visitors and being 'the hostess'. It's fun cooking for guests and doing something special.

We went to Denmark for our summerholidays this year. We spent a week in Vejlby Klit with my family, ie mum, dad, K and Al. We stayed in a gorgeous house with a pool, spa and all the goods. The weather was great and we had a really nice week there. We stayed at my parents' house for about a week as well, and it was lovely just to be with them. I guess moving away has made me more of a mum's and dad's girl than I ever was. I don't know, I just tend to miss them a lot. And of course there's Basse, who I can say with 100% certainty everyone would miss if they met him. It's always so empty coming home from a week or two in the company of Basse.

Things will speed up again in a week's time. I start work on Friday, the kids start on Monday. I'm looking forward to it in a way, which might have a lot to do with the fact that I have taken it very easy for the last couple of weeks. I need to be 100% ready for a new schoolyear with lots of new experiences and challenges.

On a more personal level I also start therapy from next week. My dad has been so kind to help me out financially, so I can get my anxiety/panicattacks sorted out. It all escalated just before the holidays started, and I was having multiple attacks most days of the week. I sense that this time out from work and most other things has helped so far. But I need to be able to handle these things in my worklife as well, so I'm getting help. I'm nervous, but looking forward to it.

Updates are hard! I can't really seem to think of all the many things I should be writing here. If I suddenly recall something I've left out, I'll fill you in.

They can break your cookie, but... you'll always have your fortune

• Currently feeling: sick
• Newest craze: Katy Perry - thanks to Patricia for introducing me to her music
• Currently in love with: the new blog design Johan's been working on for me

I've been ridiculous at writing lately. I know. I'm not even going to try and deny it. There's just been so much going on at work and as things are right now, work comes first. Sad but true. I guess it's just one of those things that comes with being a teacher. Somehow we tend to think we're a little bit saint - a little bit saviour. Only thing is, we're not really. We just seem to be unable to leave work behind when we head home. Or at least I think that's what it's all about. Experienced teachers seem to have this on/off button they can just switch on or off whenever they feel like it. Personally I just can't. I'm thinking it's because I'm a new teacher and I still let the little ones get in under my skin. I've always considered myself a rather empathetic person, but maybe there are situations where you need to be able to shut that off. If buying a bag of 'out of sight, out of mind' was possible, I'd be first in line fighting with teeth and nails.

So what has today been all about? It's been about a snotty nose and pure misery. Okay, not completely, but seriously... who enjoys having a cold? I feel sorry for myself even though I'm pretty sure it's self inflicted what with me riding my bike to work every day with no socks and semi short trousers. Have I learnt my lesson? Probably not. Note to self: Stock up on Kleenex every late April/ early May.

In 26 (almost only 25) days I'll be 28. Christ on a bike time really flies by. I've no big plans for the day at all. I've work on the day of my birthday and also the following day, so there's no real reason I should make any plans. Plus it's 28 - not much to celebrate. Send me a card if you'd like. That always puts a smile on my face. With all my past birthdays and all the cards I usually get I guess it's no wonder I'm turning wrinkly.

Check out Katy Perry I bet she'll be the talk of the town this summer, so do yourself a favour and check her out so you're prepared.

I spy with my little eye....

• Currently craving: summer holidays


• Hours spent cleaning: 5


• Currently in love with: half of IKEA's furniture, our car, my MAC eyeshadow, reading girly books, butterflies, the fact that I have two days off next week, the pink iPod nano, Patrick Stump's voice, Coheed and Cambria and Johan of course.

It's been a while since my last blog. Things are heating up at work and it's becoming more and more obvious that there's only a few months left before summer break, and by then the kids have to be ready to move up to the third grade. I think I'd rather not bore you with work talk, since it would possibly also be best if I tried to not think so much about it. Some days I feel 57 years old when I come home. I need to distance myself more.

Today we did a whole lot of cleaning. The flat really needed a good seeing to, so we spent extra time scrubbing. Johan did the laundry as well, so we can relax tomorrow and won't have to think about practical stuff. After we'd finished cleaning we went to IKEA to find a few bits and bobs we needed for the flat. Storage is always a problem, isn't it? But IKEA naturally has awesome solutions to most problems, so we got a few thingamajigs to sort our kitchen out. We spent a little time looking at dining tables and chairs and I think we kinda made up our minds about what we want. Now we just have to wait until there's a bit of money in our pockets. What with having bought a car recently, we're not exactly swimming in money. But hopefully it'll all work out fine in the end.

We spent a little time sorting out our balcony today as well. Pictured above is a hanging flowerpot we planted some nice purple flowers in (have no idea what they're called, and am too lazy to even try and figure it out) and I decorated it with a few butterflies. We also planted baby rocket salad recently and it's finally beginning to grow:

In all fairness I won't claim to have green fingers at all. I'm actually more of a specialist in killing plants, but every now and again I take pride in seeing if I've improved. Let's see if we'll have homegrown rocket salad for dinner soon and lovely, decorative flowers growing on our balcony.

Last weekend we were in Århus. We visited my parents and went to my cousin's confirmation. We also got around to see Marianne and Morten, which was great fun as always. I'm kinda bummed that we live so far apart now. I'd love to see all of them a lot more than I get to, but at least we always have a lovely time when we finally get to see each other. Marianne dished a little dirt on someone. Funny how people can pretend so much online and then in real life be total losers. Not that it comes as a surprise to me - you know, once a lying loser, always a lying loser. Just can't help this smile on my lips knowing that the loser failed her mission, just like we all predicted. Saying you're pursuing a degree, does not get you one. Who needs a degree to know that basic fact? Some people never change, not even when given the perfect opportunity to start all over. Wasted opportunities can only be excused so and so many times before it becomes evident that what goes around comes around. Karma's a bitch, ain't it? I spy with my little eye, something beginning with... ?

The one about Coheed and Cambria...

• Best part of the week: seeing Coheed and Cambria live
• Worst part of the week: a difficult parent-teacher conference
• Looking forward to: seeing Paramore live in June

Bye bye world, or will our hope still hold on?

Boy, you're never gonna see, the things that will come of these (days)

Raise your hands high!

Young brothers and sisters,

There's a world's worth of work and a need for you.

Oh, change is coming, feel these doors now closing in.

Is there no world for tomorrow if we wait for today?

A couple of years ago I came to a crossroad in my life. I basically just had enough of the way things were and I desperately needed a way to deal with a lot of feelings I didn't know how to express. This was were Coheed and Cambria came into the picture. Johan played me some of their songs and I immediately fell in love with their sound, lyrics and the entire concept of their music.

About six months ago it was announced that they would be playing in Copenhagen in February 2008. I bought tickets as soon as they were released and was like a child before Christmas. I counted months and was hyper about the idea of finally getting to see them live.

The concert was cancelled a couple of months before. That is they were going to be supporting Linkin Park on their tour of America and so they would postpone their European dates. The concert was moved to April 8th and even if it was a bit of a disappointment to have to wait even longer, it still meant that I'd get to see them live.

On Tuesday this week we were off to the concert. We were kind of early for the show and ended up queueing for around an hour. Suddenly it struck me that there was a risk that I would be the oldest person attending the concert except for the band members themselves. The place was infested by little emo-kids, who were drinking, smoking and trying to act totally rock n' roll. Luckily in the end more people my age turned up and the atmosphere of the concert was really cool. We got to be quite close to the stage without being moshed so after the support, who was Oceansize, had finished up all the butterflies started gathering in the pit of my stomach. I guess no matter how old I get, I'll always be somewhat starstruck. But as corny as it sounds they just mean a whole lot to me, not in the groupie; 'I'll love you forever and stalk you in the bushes'-way, but because somehow their music has helped me through some rough spots the last couple of years. I guess you can say it's been almost therapeutic. Gah, I sound like a real nut now, but I hope some of you know what I mean.

Anyway, after a rather long wait they finally took the stage and it was just an amazing experience. They were finally real and not just a CD on the stereo or a video on the Internet. It was an awesome show, where people completely let loose and had a great time. Sore, swollen feet from standing up for hours didn't matter all that much, because all that mattered was the fact that Coheed was there and they were playing for us. Even if there were small things that ended up being a little too much, like them spending the last 30 minutes of a two hour show doing solos, it's still one of the best experiences I've had in years. They really are an awesome band. I bet most of us have a band we listen to, who just represent a very important part of our lives and of our personalities. I know to a lot of people Coheed are an acquired taste, but then again maybe I am too?